Big Changes for M&M
This is part of our catching up phase (part 3)!
I know I haven’t given an update lately on all of our transition bringing our babies home (since like October), but it seemed our next phase of adjustment was just a gradual thing of getting to feel more and more comfortable in different settings. Then came Thanksgiving! For over 25 years my parents have hosted Thanksgiving for my dads side of the family with 20-30 of us there for the weekend. Once us cousins started getting married we all had to work out a system so that we could have one Thanksgiving together and then the other Thanksgiving year could be with their ‘new’ families. This year, instead of my parents hosting Thanksgiving we went up to Omaha where I have an aunt that is not doing well and has a serious debilitating disease. So we all went there to be together.
This was huge! Our babies have not slept anywhere besides our home (and the car occasionally) since July 7 when they arrived home! And now we were going to take a 10 day trip – be with my parents at their home for 7 days and in the middle of that trip take a 3 day trip to Omaha. Thankfully Micah and Makeda have seen the grandparents so much, there was no concern there! But, it was a different house, sleeping in pack-n-plays and a 9 hour road trip! Oh my. We prayed and prayed for our sweet M&M and all the newness.
By the time we got to my parents house – we found that our babies are AWESOME at traveling. No more than a peep from Makeda and Micah cried for less than 10 minutes! What we did not think of doing was praying for Noah and Jonah… ha! Seriously, Noah asked about every 7 minutes when we were going to get there and half way through the trip Jonah throws up all over himself while in the car seat, with Noah sitting next to him screaming to get away from the throw up! wow – was not prepared for all that 🙂
We were truly amazed to walk into my parents home (and they also have a huge lab) hold the babies for a few minutes and then they wanted down to explore. They were not nervous, they were excited to see my parents, could’ve cared less about a new place, and happily curious to check out the dog. Over the course of the next few days the babies were better than I could have possibly imagined! What a true blessing to see them so comfortable knowing they are with family that loves them. Jay and I even got a date night away and that was so nice.
Our one struggle was when we brought them different places away from mom and dad’s home. Church was overwhelming even with us wearing them the whole time. And after seeing a few family friends while out and about – you could so easily tell they were DONE! It’s amazing how you can truly see where and when they are secure and then get brief glimpses of their insecurity.
The night before Thanksgiving we drove up to Nebraska to see my wonderful cousin and his wife and their 2 boys (one of which is 2 days older than the twins!) and this is when we began to see that our little babies were tired of all the ‘newness’. The two nights there they struggled sleeping in a new place – not bad, but Makeda would moan throughout the night in her sleep. On Thanksgiving day when we were with everyone they were clearly overwhelmed so we wore them a lot. One of the things that helped so much was to put them in the baby room with Colin (cousin who’s just a couple days older) and put a gate up. They could see out but felt safe just hanging with the babies.
On Friday we went back to my parents for a few more nights and our sweet Makeda continued to moan at night. It breaks your heart to see how they process so much while sleeping and vulnerable. While we had a wonderful time – we were ready to get back to our home and see how the babies would do back in their normal environment.
Within 2 days Makeda’s moaning had stopped and our babies seemed just fine being back home. While we know this stretched her a little, overall we felt it was SO, so good. So good for them, so good for others to meet them, and so good for us to see them do well and know we can continue to branch out.
With the craziness of having 2 babies and 2 young kids I found that October and November I did just about everything to NOT leave the house by myself with the 4 kids. And yet, I have found that after this trip to KS and NE I am much more willing to try things, bring the babies to different places and just continue to watch their ques for how they are doing. It takes time to understand your kids and be able to see those ques. Previously I think it felt more daunting to go places, because I was not sure that I had ‘studied’ my kids well enough to understanding. Trial and error helps us to see how they respond and then we are able to make those adjustments.
So, overall – it was great! Truly a blessing to be family and show off our sweet babies! Here’s some fun photos from our time with family:
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